hairyshoefairy

Today I did a lot of this.

That’s washing dishes in case you couldn’t tell.

It was also laundry day and the last load of towels just finished drying.  I might even fold them tonight instead of unceremoniously dumping them into the still full basket of unfolded towels I did last week.  Maybe not.

I had Peanut clean her room again this morning before she could watch Little Einstiens (we rented it from the library and she LOVES it).  I only have her do it once a week but apparently that is still too often in her book and she whined and cried most of the time about it.  I don’t know where she gets that from.  She certainly never sees me complain about cleaning (note the stacks of dishes behind me in the above photo and you can’t even see the ones hidden by my body).  I reminded her I needed to make cookies today and if she finished her room in time she could help me but if not then she was out of luck.  At the mention of cookies all whining ended and the room was clean in less than ten minutes.  She even asked me to vacuum it.  I must remember this tactic for the future.

ODD’s family reunion is this weekend.  Just his immediate family.  Since there are 10 kids in his family and all of them are married with families of their own it’s a really big reunion with around 50 people.  We are in charge of dinner on Friday night along with one of his sisters and her family.  Most of my part will cook in the crock pot(s) all day but I also need to bring a dessert.  Rather than heat up the house that day with the oven I decided to heat up my own house with it today and make a million cookies to take.  I made a huge batch of Nieman Marcus cookies, baked half of them, and froze the other half to take along in case we need more.  I prefer them freshly baked anyway and this way they’re already put together.  I usually have frozen cookie dough balls in my freezer so I can bake a couple up whenever I want.  Which is, like, every afternoon while my kids are napping.  Or more often than not I just eat the frozen dough.  In fact, here’s a pic of Peanut eating some from this afternoon.  I ate my fair share, too.  Please don’t send me emails or comments about salmonella.  We partake of raw cookie dough knowing the risks.

The other day while at the store I saw somebody go by with plants in their cart and was reminded I still needed to buy some so I went right over to the nursery and did.  It was in the evening but I was so excited I planted them in the dark when I got home anyway.  I think a couple of my poor little tomatoes may have survived the snowy flood but they still look rather flaccid so I bought 4 tomato plants, a couple of bell peppers, and some jalapeños to replace what I lost.  As I mentioned I was really excited about replacing all my sad, dead plants and in my glee I also picked up some romaine lettuce, yellow crook-necked squash, and pickling cucumbers to give them a try.  My beans have almost literally exploded through the soil and are getting huge really fast.  Snails and slugs have been eating my peas like I cannot believe.  I saw them at work the night I planted a bunch of my new stuff and shrieked in horror.  ODD flung them into our neighbor’s yard.  We’re great neighbors, huh?  They don’t have a garden so we figured we were probably okay.  Maybe their loud dogs will kill the snails for us.  My sweet Aunt E gave me a bunch of herb starts from her garden the other day.  I was admiring her garden and she told me I should take some of the herbs home and give them a try in my garden.  I couldn’t argue with that so I’m now the proud owner of oregano, mint, sage, and tarragon.  She has a big strawberry patch in her lovely garden, too.  Seeing hers makes me excited for mine to keep growing.  I don’t want this to turn into yet another big, long gardening post but I have been taking a lot of pictures of my little babies as they grow so if you’re interested they’re in the garden set of my flickr account.  It also includes grapes, cherries, baby roses, and irises that were already in our yard when we moved in.  Peanut likes to pull the roses to pieces and sprinkle them all over the ground.  Some days I feel like royalty (a la Coming to America) walking around the yard with rose petals under my every step.

This months is a month of reunions for us.  There’s ODD’s family reunion I mentioned but a couple of weeks later I have a choir reunion, seminary council reunion, and ten year high school reunion.  We didn’t go to my five (we didn’t go to ODD’s either) but I think the ten will be fun.  At the very least the food at the high school reunion should be good.  We’re going to a great restaurant so even if the only person I have to talk to is ODD I can still stuff my face with yummy stuff.

You would think after attending a blogging conference last weekend I’d have come right home and posted all about it; how much I’d learned; all the people I’d met; how much fun I’d had.  But I didn’t.  I did learn a lot.  I did meet a bunch of great people.  I did have a lot of fun.  For some reason, though, I just haven’t managed to post, well, anything since it ended.  Maybe it’s because now that I’ve learned so much I’m feeling more self-conscious.  I’m sure that will fade as I begin posting my usual drivel again but for the first post after a blogging conference I’m feeling a bit inadequate.

You would think if I were given a gift card for Christmas to a great fabric store I’d have spent it before New Year’s.  But I didn’t.  It’s always with me in my purse so just in case I’m out and can stop by I can use it but I’ve just never managed to do it.  I’ve even been to that fabric store since Christmas.  I just wasn’t sure what I wanted to buy yet (other than a yard of everything they stock).  Of course, when I have no money to buy anything I know just what I want and what I’ll use it for.  As it is, I did manage to spend it on Monday.  Finally.  I still have three other gift cards for other things, some of which are almost a year old, that I just haven’t gotten around to for one reason or another.  It isn’t that I don’t want to spend them.  I do!  I just can’t seem to pull myself together enough to make it happen.  Plus I tend to be more picky with money I’m given as a gift than money that’s just sitting in my bank account.  I’m not willing to part with it as easily.

You would think since, as mentioned above, I purchased some fantastic fabric I’d have made something new out of it by now.  But I haven’t.  The ideal time for me to sew would be during Wingnut’s naptimes.  Unfortunately he sleeps in the same room as my sewing machines and if I’m in there sewing he isn’t sleeping.  If I let him just wander around sometimes he’ll play in Peanut’s room next door but after a while he always ends up back in the sewing room, fussing at me, crawling under the table, and sitting on my pedals.  I’m working on a solution to this so we’ll see how it goes.  Hopefully I’ll be able to post a new creation soon.

You would think with my new contact lens prescription sitting at the front desk of my Eye Guy’s office since last Wednesday (as in over a week ago) I’d have gone by to pick it up by now.  But I haven’t.  I keep meaning to and have even been out that direction but it has yet to happen.  And I really need to order some new contacts.

You would think since all but a couple of my starts were killed less than 48 hours after I planted them outside a couple of weeks ago that I’d have gone to pick up some new sprouts from the store by now.  But I haven’t.  In fact, the only time I’ve thought about it has been when I’ve been outside to see how my garden peas are doing and after going back inside the house I promptly forget about it.

You would think over two years after taking my daughter to the ER when she was sick and dehydrated that the Idiots would have figured out how to take care of it by now.  But they’re incompetent government idiots so they haven’t.  The last time I talked to the lady I’ve been working with at the hospital, the one in charge of escalated accounts (yeah, ya think my account is a little escalated!?), she told me how ridiculous it has all become (yeah, ya think!?) and she deals with this kind of stuff for a living!  Um, yeah, that should tell you something.  There is so much more I could share about this (and don’t you worry your pretty little heads, I have every appallingly ridiculous detail written down for my records) but it makes me indescribably furious when I get into it so I’m going to stop right there.  Suffice it to say I’m still in the midst of dealing with it.  Yes.  Still.

You would think, with only about ten pounds left to reach my goal weight I’d be super motivated to just knock those last few puppies out.  But for some reason I just can’t.  As I mentioned about a month ago I’m back to my pre-pregnancy weight but I’m still wanting to get back to my pre-beauty school weight which is another ten pounds away.  I’m not sure why but I’m just not feeling that motivated.  I know I should be doing it but there are so many other things I’d rather be doing than exercising.  Maybe I need to figure out a new time of the day to do it.  Maybe I need to make up a new system for myself that will remind me what I’m working for and why.  Apparently I need to take some time to straighten myself out, put on my big girl panties, and get to work.

You would think after munching on a fistful of dirt and rocks Wingnut would realize such nasty grittiness is not good eats and not attempt to consume anymore.  But he hasn’t figured that out.  In fact, during the writing of this post I’ve had to wrestle yet another palmful out of his mouth for the hundredth time this spring.  He actually fights to keep it in!  I don’t know about you, but the last time I checked dirt tasted like, well, dirt.  And that’s not a good thing.  Why do my children feel compelled to taste everything?  I know some kids “learn” that way but it really just grosses me out.

You would think after answering the same question eleventy hundred times in a row Peanut would already know the answer and stop asking.  She doesn’t.  It’s like she asks just to ask and doesn’t even bother listening for the answer.  I’ve gotten to the point where the second time she asks the same question I stop whatever I’m doing, make her look me in the eye, restate the answer, and tell her if she asks me again she doesn’t get to have/do/see/play whatever it is she’s asking about because I’ve already given her an answer once and don’t want to continue repeating myself for the rest of eternity.  Maybe that makes me a mean mom but on days like today having to answer the same questions endlessly has me constantly on the verge of shouting, “Stop the insanity!”

You would think after hearing Cameron Rafati at the conference and realizing I actually enjoyed some of his music I’d have bought a CD while I was there.  But I didn’t.  Luckily I can buy it online.  Also, in case you’re interested, his video for 1 in 10 was shot at the Beehive Tea Room.  Isn’t it a cool place?

• Do you ever feel like you’ve been busy, busy, busy all day long yet at the end of the day you look around only to find you’ve accomplished a whole lot of nothing?  It seems I’ve been having lots of days like this lately.
• Wingnut had an especially rough time one night last week.  Our yard isn’t very even so while walking around he tripped and fell, scraping his forehead on one of the pavers at the base of our deck stairs.  Less than thirty minutes later he decided to dive down the deck stairs, scraping the side of his head on the pavers again plus getting a big bonk just above that.  The scrapes have scabbed over and are healing nicely but the bruise is still pretty big and obvious.  It was fun getting to explain all his owies to everyone at church on Sunday because they were so obvious everyone had to ask.
• For a little oversharing, I weaned Wingnut this weekend.  It’s gone really well, actually.  We only had two times (one at 6 am) when he cried because I wouldn’t feed him but eventually he gave in and sucked down his cup of milk.  Now he happily accepts it without question.  I’m still feeling a bit full but it’s getting better.  In other TMI news I had my annual exam this morning.  My OB is retiring in July so this was my last appointment with him.  He’s very nice and I’m glad I got in before he closed up shop but it was still, you know, an annual exam with all the delightful fun that kind of appointment entails.
• When did one space after a period become acceptable?  When I took typing classes it was always two spaces.  Even in college, which wasn’t all that long ago, mind you, it was still two spaces.  I know.  I was an English major at the time.  I recently read something Teeny typed up and was like, “Uh, so what’s with the single space after all the periods?” and she told me it was what she was taught in school.  Wha?? When did that happen?  I’ve noticed it has become the norm on things like facebook, twitter, and texts where you only have so many characters to work with but in everyday typing?  Really?  Is anybody else outraged by this?  I also wonder if that’s the reason all my archives got all jacked up when I updated my version of Wordpress a while ago.  I had that weird A with a carat above it after almost every period and couldn’t figure out why and have yet to go back and fix the first two years because I’m too lazy so if you’re confused you can still check out an old post and see what I mean.  Anyway, in case you couldn’t tell, this single space conspiracy is rather disturbing to me and I plan on forever continuing in my two-spaces ways.
• Wingnut has begun going through our indoor recycling can and tossing everything onto the floor.  It’s awesome being constantly surrounded by trash.  Thank goodness the real garbage can has a lid.
• I had to get Peanut some new sandals today because on her old ones the velcro stopped working.  I know that sounds ridiculous but seriously.  The grabby loops are all still grabby but it seems the softy loops have almost all broken through or something so they aren’t actually loops anymore so they no longer stay hooked to the grabby loops.  Yes, I know this sounds like idiotic drivel but I found it kind of weird and annoying because Peanut’s sandals no longer stayed clasped which means they no longer stayed on her feet when she walked which means she got frustrated with them which resulted in her throwing herself in a loud, huffy, dramatic heap on the floor every few minutes.  So yeah, we got Peanut some new sandals today.
• I’m going to the Casual Blogger Conference this weekend and am really excited about it.  I couldn’t swing the money to go but knew they were giving away tickets all over the place several months ago and I got lucky enough to win one of them!  I have no idea what I’m doing and I have a bunch of stuff I’m still trying to get through before it begins on Thursday night but I’m really looking forward to it.
• My sister, Teeny, is graduating from high school this week.  It’s kind of freaking me out and making me feel old.  And I’m not that old!  As a graduation gift I got her a string of freshwater pearls like the ones I got for Mother’s Day.  Pearls aren’t really her typical style but it’s such a classic piece I think every girl should have a string.  I’m sure in the future she’ll have plenty of occasions to wear them.  Yesterday she and my mom went shopping for a cedar chest and she texted me a picture of the one she chose.  It’s beautiful and I think it’s cool to see the style she chose for her traditional graduation gift.
• I made homemade pizza for dinner tonight.  There are very few homemade pizzas I like.  And by “very few” I mean I only like mine and only this one crust recipe.  Yeah, it’s a bit snobbish and I’m sure many people wouldn’t like mine (Teeny, for example, isn’t a fan but she’s also a picky eater) but I like it and ate basically half of one of the pizzas by myself tonight.
• My cousin, Aliese, compiled most of her favorite recipes into a blog so when she’s out and needs to get stuff for a recipe she can just look it up on her phone and see what she needs to pick up.  I haven’t tried all the recipes on there but she has so she can stand behind them.  If you’re looking for something new to make for dinner check it out.  I’ve already made a list of a few new recipes I want to try.

• Church was a bit wild today.  ODD was asked last minute to fill in for the Primary Pianist.  Considering he was sight reading most of the music he did a good job.  Since he was playing the piano I took Wingnut to class with me.  For the last month or so ODD’s been taking Wingnut to class with him so I could regulalry teach without the major distraction a baby is to 8-11 year olds.  Wingnut did really well today and didn’t try to eat anybody’s shoes or scriptures so that’s progress from the last time I took him with me.  Part way through the lesson the Primary secretary brought in a wailing Peanut.  She didn’t know what had happened but apparently Peanut had been crying for a while and the secretary thought maybe I’d be able to calm her down.  I shouted the lesson to my class over her continued wails as she sobbed on my lap.  Wingnut saw me cradling Peanut and decided perhaps he needed some cuddling at that moment as well so he came over and began fussing until I picked him up and tried to make a little more room for him.  Peanut wasn’t happy to be sharing the throne so making room was not really easy and all the while the wailing continued.  We carried on in this manner much to the entertainment of my class, I’m sure, for another five or ten minutes until ODD, having finished singing time, burst in, swept Peanut away, much to her disappointment and protest, and left me, once again, with only a squirmy little boy on my lap.  Of course once Peanut had vacated the premises he was more than happy to get down again and play on the floor.  I came to find out after class that when Peanut came back to Primary for sharing and singing time she had wanted to sit by both ODD and her teacher.  There was already a little boy in the seat she wanted so, naturally, that disappointment called for a complete and utter meltdown.  Oh, the injustice!  ODD couldn’t do much since he was playing the piano and Peanut was pretty out of control, as her emotional outbursts are apt to be, so that’s why she was brought in to me until ODD could come to my rescue.  Being a mom is so fun at times like this.
• Wingnut is still not walking on his own.  Honestly I’m pretty shocked.  He’s been cruising for months and in January when the doctor suggested I try to keep him crawling until St. Patrick’s Day I actually laughed out loud and couldn’t imagine him crawling past Valentine’s Day.  I hadn’t heard the 4 month recommendation before with Peanut but maybe that’s because I was living in CA at the time and I always got the impression my doctor was just happy to see my baby was being fed and changed regularly.  Anyway, once Peanut started cruising it was a matter of a couple of weeks before she walked by herself.  Wingnut is more than happy to cruise along furniture and hasn’t shown really any sign of a desire to let go and be free-moving until just this last week.  I think Em’s post about the difference between her boys pretty much sums up my experience as well.  Wingnut’s on his own time table and that’s perfectly fine with me.  He’s beginning to take a few steps here and there but nothing terribly consistent.  I’m sure it will happen when he really feels ready.
• I’m working on a new blog design.  I’ve liked the simplicity of mine but lately have been feeling it’s a little too bare.  I’m ready for a new look complete with correct names (sorry, NYDD is still up there coming on a year after the change) and updated likenesses.  It probably still won’t be for a while because I have a lot going on and it takes more brain power than I have some days but I’m happy to have it in the works.
• The other day Peanut was helping me in the kitchen, telling me stories, and being goofy while we got lunch ready.  As we were going over to the table to eat she reached around, put her hand on her lower back, and told me, “I think I threw my back out.”  I almost dropped the food I was carrying to the table I was laughing so hard.
• I’ve started having Peanut do some chores.  I’m going to try a few different methods to track what she’s doing each day but so far having her do some jobs has been a very good thing.  I’ve been thinking for a while that she needed to begin having some sort of consistent responsibility and talked to quite a few people about ideas for jobs and tracking and motivation.  I finally put it into action last week and am going to try a different method this week.  She’s done really well so far and I’m proud of her for (usually) being willing to work.
• We took a last minute trip to visit our parents yesterday.  ODD has been scanning some family photos for his mom so he wanted to pick up some more to work on.  It’s been so cool to see some of these photos!  Four-ish years ago we scanned all  8,000+ of his parents slides.  It was fun to see a lot of his family members in them but most of ODD’s pictures were taken on regular film and were developed into prints so most of them weren’t included in the slide scanning.  With this project we’re seeing photos of ODD as a baby that we’ve never seen before.  This afternoon he even scanned photos of his parent’s wedding.  These photos are priceless and we’re so excited to see them and share them with the rest of his family.
• We also helped my parents yesterday.  They bought some new furniture for their basement (it’s awesome!) and asked if we’d be able to help move it since my brother was out of town, my dad still can’t exert himself that much, and our friend who is living with them right now broke his collarbone a couple of days ago while skiing.  We were more than happy to help.  My strength training has paid off a bit because I was able to heft the couches into the house with ODD and my parents helped us angle them down the stairs.  I was quite impressed with myself even if ODD was chuckling at me as I proclaimed how strong I was.  If you saw me you’d probably be laughing, too, but it felt good to help and I was proud of myself.
• I’m planning out the dress I want to make for Peanut for Easter.  I’m excited about it but still need to find a pattern for it (not making up my own for this one) and figure out the colors I want to work with.  Then comes the hard part: figuring out a time I can actually sit down and put it together.  At least the ideas are rolling.

I’ve been blogging for over 4 years now.

Sometimes that seems like a long time.

Sometimes it doesn’t.

Several times a year I ask myself why I’m still publishing random drivel online for the whole universe to read.  I don’t have a large following by any stretch of the imagination.  I also don’t read many of the “big and professional” bloggers out there.  I like the idea of going to smaller blog conferences where I actually know people but don’t really feel like forking over the cash to attend.  I like writing thoughtful posts but with two mobile, energetic kids that need attention and/or supervision almost constantly I’m not left with as much time as I used to have to be able to devote to my blog.  It’s frustrating.

I don’t exactly have a real niche, either.  I don’t blog about politics or pop culture or review cool things.  Nobody has ever approached me to advertise on my blog and I only occasionally share products I am currently in love with.  I don’t promote my own business through my blog (though I attempted with On Autumn’s Wings I decided to pull the plug after a few months when I realized I don’t have the time to sew enough to keep things stocked and up to date with the seasons and it makes me sad but that’s another topic for another day).  I don’t write book reviews.  I’m don’t really perform anymore so I don’t have anything exciting like that to share either.

Though I do share photos I’ve taken my blog is a far cry from a photography blog.

Though I do occasionally share recipes I love my blog is not really a foodie blog.

Though I do share my spurts of creative sewing and other craftiness my blog is not necessarily a sewing or a crafting blog.

Though I do share goofy or interesting (at least to me) things my kids do my blog is not exactly a mommy blog.

The best I’ve been able to come up with is that my blog probably falls under the umbrella of “personal” blogs.  In my mind that means my blog is sort of a mish mash of all things that revolve around me.  Since I do happen to sew and cook and be a SAHM those things get included but I don’t feel my blog is limited to just those things.  Some readers may disagree with this assessment but that is my view.

Anyway, back to my recurring question; why do I continue publishing the incredibly fascinating details of my life on the internet?

The things I come back to whenever I ask myself this question are always the same.  I like having complete control over this little thing in my life.  I can write what I want and make it look the way I want.  Because of the things I write, to me, this blog is as good as a paper journal.  It includes almost all the major events in my life in addition to many of the every day minor things.  Plus, if I didn’t blog I still wouldn’t be keeping much of a real journal.  I like having a hard copy of my blog, too.  I don’t usually go back and read my archives online but it is kind of fun to pull the published books off the shelf and thumb through them.  It’s priceless for my family.  Finally, I love the people I’ve met through blogging.  It’s a very social thing for me.  It’s hard for me to get out and be social with the kids in tow and some days the farthest we go is to the mailbox.  I still like adult interaction, though, so getting to communicate with other grown-ups online is one of my favorite aspects of blogging.  I’ve met some of the most amazing women through blogging.  They leave me inspired.  They touch my heart.  They understand the things I’m going through and are supportive.  I laugh with them.  I cry with them.  Many of them I have come to know better than I know most of my in-person friends.  Whenever I consider closing up shop the friendships and interactions are probably the biggest things that prevents me from going through with it.

Don’t worry.  I’m not going anywhere.  This little corner of the internet has come to mean a great deal to me and I’m not willing to give it up.  I consider it occasionally but the idea never lasts long.  I’d miss it too much.  Basically, what I’m trying to say is even after 4 years of blogging there are still things about my blog that make me feel insecure and unsure and I wonder if I should be doing things differently but when I really consider why I continue posting my silly nonsense I remember those things aren’t the reasons I blog anyway.  This is something I do for me.  It’s a good thing.  It makes me happy.

And shouldn’t we all do good things that make us happy?